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Words, words, words

Cole is slowly ditching the pacifier except for naps and bedtime, but still not a talker. He loves to grab you by the hand, point, make gestures, little begging noises, and will even say "thank you" and "excuse me." Occasional words come out here or there...blueberries, cracker...but it's not conversational.

Oh, don't get me wrong. You can give him an extended list of directions. "Please go in your room under the chair and bring me your trucks." Done. Somehow we missed the "me have milk" phase and have gone straight into selective full articulation. Was I absent the day in child development where we discussed this during my psychology degree?

He grabbed all his stuffed animals the other day with a loud, "I love them!" Today he told me, regarding his helicopter getting caught inside his car track, "it got stuck." Very matter of fact. His choosing to communicate with words seems to occupy a middle ground where he can't be too upset or excited. Yet enthusiastic enough that he feels like bringing forth sound. Like it's extra work. This from the kid who runs up and down the hallway 20 times pulling on your hand to make sure you follow along.

And the funny thing is his "tantrums" that are so infamous at this age are really more like negotiations that have broken down. There is the occasional frustration with a toy that won't work, but 9 times out of 10 if he's going to have a fit it's after a back and forth with either parent. Something like--crackers all gone. Cole signs for more using his hands. "No, it's almost dinner and we'll have pasta." Cole makes a cute, sad face and signs for more again. "No. Would you like to go read a book instead?" Frustrated sign for more. "No." Tears, crying on the floor kicking legs. "Ok, that's fine. I'm going to go read books by myself."

I decided to stop trying to rationalize with him long ago. It is what it is. No amount of bringing him up on my lap to calmly discuss the situation is going to make it fair in his eyes.

In some ways, I can't get past how his emotional maturity has perhaps helped keep him from talking. By and large, he knows what he wants, where it is located or how to make his point effectively in a calm manner that we find acceptable. I maintain that he doesn't have much of a need for talking because it's not a useful tool for him yet. That will change.

I would just love if he learned the word "please" in the meantime.

Comments

  1. I have just started to rationalize with Evan, I now find myself asking why when he says no. He usually gives me and answer that is silly to me. Like, Do you want to go to bed? No! Why? Because I stay on the couch, c'mon mama.

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