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Primary caregiver vs. coming-home parent?

Ok enough with the non-kid stuff. Back to parenting!

Kelly and I had a few interesting thoughts when I came home from my Dad Night away this evening. Kelly has turned into the "dad" who comes home after a day of work and Cole loves on her. They play new games; he's a maniac. I feel like he likes her more...ridiculous and not true. But considering she used to feel unloved--or at least less enjoyed than me--it is a pretty hard turnaround in his feelings and actions towards her. He loves his mom.

To be fair, I get to have the baths, the lunches, the playground trips. And we have wonderful days. In fact, all that time together as his primary caregiver means he is...used to me. I'm dad. I'm cool and fun but I also enforce rules and wash his face and tell him what toys he can and can't have. I'm much more the pragmatic one while mom gets her 2 hours after she gets home before he goes to bed. It's party city.

Just an observation. I think it also has to do with his perceptions of us and he just is starting to treat us separately regardless of how much time he gets with either parent. We have different personalities. It's natural.


  1. I think I have a similar but also different dynamic. Since Evan is at the sitter all day, he hates to leave me and loves when I pick him up. He also throws a tantrum when I get him and usually gets crazy. He sees dada even less so he doesn't want to go to him when we get home. But if Eric comes home at bedtime, Evan becomes a lunatic.


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